A Plea to Blogger Friends

I had thoroughly enjoyed blogging my life stories away in thatgirlwasme.com. I was very open, I expressed myself freely…and I had so much fun doing it and being appreciated for candid writing. Now, I feel very stifled. First, my dad gets mad at me. Then second, somebody started harassing me. I closed down my blog to avoid issues with the family AND to regain my privacy as I had started getting worried. I stopped tweeting on Twitter or updating on Friendster. The only thing I updated was my Facebook and I didn’t do it much. Recently, I got a little comfortable again and opened a new blog hoping to restart the activity I had enjoyed soooo much before.

But my harasser-slash-stalker would not stop. I keep getting emails or FB messages regularly. I got them from an email address bearing MY name but having rude messages. I also got messages on Facebook under fake profiles…I block the fake profiles but then the person would come up with MORE fake profiles. I have reported each and every one of them to Facebook…but they haven’t done anything and I’m not sure they ever will. Just to give you a taste of this harassment, here are some messages I got (warning: explicit content!!!). This person is pretending to be a girl who is with my boyfriend.

FUCK YOU CATHY……PUTANG INA MOOOOOOOOOOO………………

…MALANDI KA…UNANO……..SANA BAWAT PUTOK NG BARIL NA YAN SA MUKHA MO TUMAMA….PUTANG INA MMO….

putang ina moooooooooooo. hayop ka malanding pokpok

putang ina mo cathy. ang kapal talaga ng mukha mo hayop ka. ungoy ka ka talaga. kala mo di ko alam kung san ka nakatira sa national city ha. puntahan kaya kita diyan sa 16th street gusto mo gago ka. alam mo saksakan ka ng tanga. ilang beses mo na akong nakaharap di mo pa alam. tanga ka talaga. sabi ni r___ birthday daw ng kapatid mo sa 18. lalandiin mo nanaman para sumama sayo,putang ina mo. marami na akong alam tungkol sayo. marami ng nakwento si r__ sakin tungkol sayo hayop ka. ang laki talaga ng bibig mo hayop ka. malanding pokpok. ungoy ka. lalo na dun sa picture mo naka green ka hahahaha….. mukha ka talagang unggoy. unanong ungoy hahaha……hayop ka putang ina mo malandi ka.

“Putangina mo….hayop ka………. mamatay ka na. kapal ng mukha mo…..shiiiiiiiiitttttttttt ka. malanding pokpok. pag kasama mo si r___ kala mo lagi kang kinikiliti malandi ka. putang ina mo……mamatay ka na………..laki ng bunganga mo. pandak, tama yan gamit ka ng booster seat para naman maabot mo yung gas hahahaha…….kamukha mo daw yung aso mo sa ni r___ hahaha……..fuck you. taga ateneo ka pa naman, malandi…tang ina mo……….”.

Wouldn’t all those messages make your blood curdle if they were sent to you on a regular basis for over a year now?!? At first I blamed my boyfriend for it…asking him who this is. But I later found out it’s from MY side. Somebody from MY past…not his. I have only ONE suspect…only ONE person crazy enough to do something like this. And that person is walking amongst you there in Manila. He can’t speak much Tagalog so he obviously has an accomplice. Everything he says in his messages come from information he can see on my Facebook…like pictures I post…or status updates. I always just ignore these messages. I felt that if I ignore it long enough, the person will get tired of doing this. But it has been OVER A YEAR now!  And I kept being pushed to the corner. I have made my Facebook private and for friends only. But then he still sent me messages with information on my Facebook. So I had to delete several bloggers from my friends list ‘just in case’ since he is friends with several bloggers that I am friends with. Then I disabled the “send a message” to me. So this person sent a message TO MY MOTHER, who, because of the wonders of the Internets, is on Facebook as well…and my brother. Imagine how I felt when my mother asked me why somebody is messaging her something bad about her daughter. I can take all the insults and cussing…but infiltrate my family?!?

I don’t even know what this is called anymore when I report it to Facebook…is it harassment? cyber bullying? hate message? threats? what about all of the above! I feel so vulnerable except for the fact that so far, this person has only done that much…harass me online. But what next? Will I be physically attacked one day by someone crazy enough to keep this on for over A YEAR??  I don’t even get why this person sees it fit to harass me when he was the one who did bad things to me in 2007. The only bad thing I did to him was walk away and leave him.

I really feel pushed to the corner…like my only choice is to severe ties with everyone. I don’t want to change my entire life because of one crazy person. I already regret having been with this person as he turned out to be a total monster. And believe me, I berate myself every time I get a message for not being more careful who I associate with.

This person, by the way, already has a criminal record here in the US. Which is why he is hiding away in Manila until his money runs out. THIS PERSON IS A CONVICTED FELON. If you are the one assisting him in this cyber harassment, take note that you are assisting A CONVICTED FELON.

Here are some names this person has used to harass me on Facebook and email:

Ruel Jimenez

Martha Gomez

Tanya Soriano

Bea Cruz

Ana Rose

Ana Mendoza

Vicky Torres

He has many friends among bloggers…and perhaps business partners as well. Please don’t be his partner is harassing people who are not doing anything to harm anybody. Please DO NOT post this entry in your blogs as well nor mention it explicitly as I don’t want him to enjoy the fact that he is getting attention from me. Just be warned about this person. And don’t assist him in his psycho behavior. Remember, he has a criminal record. He has also endangered the life of another woman here because of drug abuse.

IMAGINE how you would feel if this happened to you. We all have ‘public’ lives in the blogosphere and Facebook. This shows a little of the bad side of this public life when evil people decide to ruin it for the rest of us.

I told very few people about this blog…and now you know why. And if I disappear again, you know why as well.

Thank you.

PS. If I sent you this entry or told you about it, it doesn’t mean I’m accusing you of being the accomplice. On the contrary, you are part of the group I trust. I just wanted to warn you of this person and to just get the word out without gratifying this person with attention. The accomplice may, more likely,  not even be a blogger. I just know that this suspect could not have done all this by himself and his accomplice had been in my Facebook friends. I also did not mention the person’s name because I am 99% sure he is doing it…but will leave the 1% as a courtesy ‘benefit of the doubt”.

29 Wishes for my 29th Birthday

My 29th birthday is now officially over…and man…I can’t believe that I’m 29 now! ugghh. I know people say ohh you’re still young. But I honestly feel like 29 is old=( But one thing hasn’t changed over the years…I still feel very excited about my birthday and I still feel optimistic that the year ahead will be great;) Whether it does turn out great is another matter=P But to make myself look forward to my 29th year, I made a list of 29 wishes for my 29th birthday=)

 

29 Wishes for My 29th Birthday…(in no particular order)

1. Laptop! – I keep wishing for a laptop so I can write my blogs and have my own private computer. But the only laptop that has ever come my way was a disaster…and almost murdered me. It was too big and heavy! Now I think my dad wants to get me one of those refurbished laptops being sold on eBay. What I’d really like though are those cute little laptops being sold now for about $400 each. Tiny, lightweight…but you can still do a lot of things on it.

2. License – I just got my permit last April and since then I’ve been taught by my ex, my dad and a driving instructor. I’ll be taking my test after my birthday and I’m soooo nervous about it. But I can’t wait to get my license so I can finally drive myself everywhere and explore!

3. New car – My dad bought me a white Saturn SL something…I don’t even know…like a 1998 model. Do they even sell Saturn in the PI? Anyway, it has ‘pawis’-windows instead of power windows…and I can barely reach the pedals. I like driving it cuz I’ve gotten used to it…but of course I still want to one day have a new car that’s more…uhh…modern and easier to drive.

4. MASSAGE! and full spa treatment- Haven’t had a massage in ages!

5. Manicure, Pedicure and haircut (yah, they’re all expensive here!)

6. A new wardrobe that’s 4-seasons friendly.

7. A sexy body…like this…

yah…i put my face on Tila Tequila’s body. Cuz she’s short like me!

8. Dance classes!

9. A real job that pays real money

10. A new cellphone! – My cellphone’s a relic. I’ve never even had a blackberry.

11. My own apartment – I saw a really nice loft downtown…and the closet is bigger than my entire pad in the Philippines!=P

12. A Chi hair straightener

13. Money Money Money and more spending money!

14. A weekend getaway!

15. To graduate=) was hoping with honors but the accounting class blew my chances for that. I’m now on a 3.666 GPA and need a 3.7=P

16. More time to read books and watch movies.

17. To have my older brother and sister and nephews here in the US with me=)

18.  To be able to have a vacation in the Philippines=)

19. More friends who are more like my friends in the Philippines;)

20. The man for me! ( related to number 26.) – The ‘one’…whatever that means=P

21. A gaming console…like Xbox or PS or even just a Nintendo DS=)

22. Invisalign braces and whatever dental work I need.

23. For my papers to get approved=P

24. Health, wealth, love and happiness

25. Independence from people who try to control my life here

26.

 

 

Nuff said;)

 

27. World peace!

28. For the economy to improve again=)

29. and lastly,  Birthday sshhhhhhh! Birthday sshhhhhhh!

What’s the sshhhhh???

Party! I want a birthday party;) hahaha!

My Summer Breakup Theory

I was on nerd mode for the past couple days for an accounting exam so I haven’t been able to post. And now I just finished the exam and I’m dreading the impending B=( So while I recover, I’m just going to post this little quickie=)

Like I just revealed to the whole world, I just had a breakup with my boyfriend (now ex) this July. And the weird thing was that several people also went through the same thing. My boss had a breakup…2 classmates had a breakup…friends of friends had breakups. And my friend said that from her experience, here in the US, summer is the time for breakups. Now that is sad because my birthday falls on a summer. And I wondered why summer would be a season for breakups. My Japanese friend said it’s probably because there are so many beautiful people on the beach that people just want to be single. I have a different theory….

Summer means it’s hot…which means people don’t like to have sex cuz it’s too hot…when people don’t have sex they become cranky….and when they become cranky, they fight a lot…and breakup. IN SUMMER.

Then by winter it’s cold again and time to cuddle up to someone…

My Filipino Group for School

It’s hard being an international student…which is why at my school, National University here in San Diego, they encourage the international students to join activities. I was honestly a little pissed when I found out about a month ago  that the Chinese students and the Indian students had already formed student groups because I had the same idea, way back when I started, to form my Filipino group. But after my idea for the newsletter name ‘National University International Students Activities News and Current Events’…. or N.U.I.S.A.N.C.E. was rejected, I didn’t push for my org anymore.  But now that the Chinese students have their NUCSA (Chinese Student Association) and the Indians have their Indian Student Association, I am also revisiting my Filipino student group idea. I will call it the National University Filipino Student Association, International Division…or NUFSAID.

Here are my proposed activities for NUFSAID.

1. Balut for a Dollar day – The Chinese students had their ‘Dumpling Day’ where you pay a dollar for 3 dumplings…or something like that. And the Indians had their curry day for $1.50. This is to expose other students to Chinese and Indian food respectively. Most of the American faculty and staff enjoy this. So I will have my Balut for a Dollar Day…”We’ll give you a dollar if you eat a balut!” (with the chick of course!)

2. Filipino Festival – The Indians had their Indian Festival, Dussehra…where they had Indian music and dance numbers.

This is me with one of the dancers who danced a traditional Indian dance…

and here’s a video of a guy who danced a solo…err…modern dance. It’s weirdly interesting… I guess=P

Not to be outdone, my program will also have the best Filipino dancer ever…

 

Yes…si Jolibee.

And no cultural event will be complete without a  live viewing of Wowowee c/o TFC. I still get surprised how Americans and Mexicans here know about Wowowee (through their Filipino friends). I went out with some friends last week and my Mexican officemate, after drinking too much alcohol,  kept yelling “Wowoweeee! Wowoweee!” while doing the actions in an indecent manner. So i guess that would be a good way to share our culture with the other students.   

Oh, lastly, we will have a film showing…an art film, of course, featuring a popular ‘film-maker’ from Manila…

(Btw, I’m super behind on Pinoy showbiz news…I still haven’t gotten a hold of the actual sex video! Ayoko tong baduy na Careless Whisper! Anyone???)

3.  Bring a Citizen Speed Dating Party – Most of the Chinese and Japanese I meet here are just here to study…then they will go back to their home countries to take over their parents’ businesses. Most of the Pinoys and Indians I meet here are here as a student BUT wish to stay forever. And we all know that the easiest way to stay in the US forever is to marry a citizen! So I will have a speed dating or ‘lock and key party’ (getting popular now) where the students who particpate have to bring an American citizen of the opposite sex. Para balanced diba. Then their citizen friend can mingle with the other students and hopefully a non-citizen and a citizen will find love….and a green card.

4. Photocopy Lady Service – When I was studying in Ateneo, I rarely had to buy textbooks. Why should we buy when the photocopy lady already has the important chapters sent by the teacher ready for us for pick up! I think it’s the same way in the other colleges too. Here, i always have to worry every month about how I can get my books. They’re so expensive! Usually about $100 per book! So I really miss the photocopy ladies of my college days. Plus, the photocopying in our school is self service. You insert a card and do everything yourself. Each page costs 10 cents I think. =( Sad! So I think it would be a lucrative business to start a photocopy service too…underground of course!

5. The Under-the-Table Job Fair – Probably 75 to 80% of the international students here have jobs. Under the table, of course. Most of them are waitresses…I know one who drives a pedicab downtown… Usually they get jobs from people from their own country. Like a japanese student would work for a Japanese restaurant owner…a Chinese friend would work for a Chinese Karaoke club owner….But the funny thing is, it seems harder for a Pinoy student to get such a job! I don’t know if it’s because the Filipino establishments don’t want to get in trouble or if they already have too many TNT’s working or if the Filipino’s who have been here longest are those that won’t extend a hand to fellow Filipinos. So anyway, to help the Filipino students out, an Under-the-Table Job Fair would be great! PS. under-the-table isn’t supposed to mean something bastos okay=P

So there…my proposed activities for NUFSAID. Unfortunately, in our school, there are 190+ Chinese students, 150+ Indian students…..and only 9 Filipino students =(  Weh! Wala kasi kaming nursing=(

Breakup Drama Special

Raise your hands if you have ever been in a breakup…

Okay, so you can relate to me…yey!…read on…

This morning…at about 4am…I woke up from a bangungot style nightmare. I was gasping for air by the time I opened my eyes. My heart was beating so fast and I had to turn on the lights because I was so scared. In my dream I was being attacked by one of those white Japanese ghosts..

At that point, I knew I have to seriously start moving on now.

Whatever Happened to Sorsi?

I was looking at some Facebook posts yesterday and saw an old acquaintance say to another friend “Ano na nga ba nangyari kay Sorsi?” And several people have asked that question since I quietly slipped out of the country in 2007 (I swear there was no scandal or anything that made me leave the country!) So as my second blog post, I will now answer that question.

I have been in San Diego since October of 2007. My first few months here were riddled with drama…but became stable by around July of 2008.

I am taking my MBA in NU…yes, as in National University…but not the Bulldogs one. It’s an okay school…but we chose it mostly  entirely because it had the cheapest tuition out of all the schools I canvassed. I am counted as an international student and there are only 9 of us there from the Philippines. When I asked why…a friend said all the other Filipinos are in nursing schools. My classes are usually at night…from 5:30 to 10 in the evening…so you can imagine how ‘attentive’ I am in class. Surprisingly, I have done well in school. My grades are A’s. A-’s and a couple B+’s. That is  a stark contrast to my B’s and C’s in Ateneo but then Ateneo is a much harder school than NU…and my classmates are either English-challenged foreign students or Americans who got used to the American education system (which is less challenging than Asian schools). I worked part time in school before on a scholarship. I worked for the International Student Services office…which meant I had to help foreign students. My services ranged from answering questions about the school…to helping the new Chinese student get some hot water for her morning tea. Because I am constantly surrounded by fellow-foreigners, my English has deteriorated a little. So forgive me if my Eng-rish falters.

The Prodigal Blogger

About a year ago, I shut down my blog “That Girl Was Me” due to ‘unbloggable reasons’. The main reason was that I got into a huge fight with my dad over that blog (and the ‘mga kabastusan’ in my blog)…and out of respect for the man who is taking care of me now even if I’m already almost 29 (gasp!), I took it down. But ever since I stopped blogging, I felt like there’s a part of me that’s missing. Everytime I see something funny….I always think to myself “I wish I still had a blog..” Sometimes in the shower, I would think up entire blog entries…but I didn’t have anywhere to put them (and yes, my best thoughts are always the ones I have in the shower). I think once a blogger, always a blogger.

But then I also had apprehensions about starting to blog again. First of all, I’m now in the US and all my former readers are in the Philippines…experiencing different things from what I’m experiencing. Baka walang maka relate sa akin. What do people care about a 4th of July sale here or some special event when none of them are near enough to go there. Second, I’ve had a pretty boring existence here…and my formerly ‘famous’ sense of humor might have dissipated a little. Third, I don’t want to risk another meltdown from a family member. And lastly…what if people have already forgotten about me??

But here I am blogging again. Why? Well, first of all, I feel like ‘SORSI’ is slowly disappearing. People call me Cathy now…or ‘Khet-i’ by my Oriental friends…or ‘Katie’ by my European friends…or “Katerini’ by Brazilians. And I feel like my old personality is disappearing with the name. And I don’t want that to happen…even if I’m getting older now. Blogging again is my attempt to revive and keep alive the Sorsi in me=) Second, I miss my friends so much…but I hardly have the time to email everyone or even just to message people on Facebook! So blogging will help me keep everyone updated without having to copy and paste to emails=) Third, as some of you may know, I have recently gotten out of another relationship (boo hoo!) and it has been really difficult for me to not wallow in sorrow everyday (that’s a whole different blog entry…coming soon!). Blogging is my own personal form of therapy and sorry to say future readers but you are all going to be my shrinks. I don’t have that many friends here and most of my friends here already have boyfriends and families to focus on. So I’m glad I have you guys to ‘talk’ to;)  Fourth, some people have been asking me why I quit blogging and have been telling me that they miss my blog. I’m not sure the quality of my blogs will still be the same as when I had That Girl Was Me…but I hope it will=) Fifth, and most importantly, I just love writing. And who cares if nobody reads my blog or whatever…I just want to keep on doing this for as long as I can (and hopefully I’ll always have time for it). 

So here it is…my new blog. PAMBATANG PANTI. I started out making one with my name on it but thought of being a little more discrete for a semblance of privacy. I will also be more careful about revealing names or revealing too much info (which is really hard for me=P). Pambatang Panti is in no way copied from ‘Happy Slip’… even if both are undergarments.   I was just thinking of something to name my blog and I remembered during my DWTL, I was nicknamed “Pambihirang Pandakekong May Pambatang Panti” (Amazing midget with kiddie underwear) because I liked wearing kiddie underwear. Just as That Girl Was Me…this will chronicle my journey once again…as i continue to grow (not physically grow unfortunately) and build my life here. Hopefully, it will be an interesting journey now that I’m single again;)

So here I am again blogosphere! I hope you’ll welcome me back into your arms!